Last Sunday, our Sr. Pastor said, "The whole Christian life is an audible." That sentence literally brought me to tears. I feel like audibles are how God directs me. I am not saying that I hear God's audibles like I hear my childern's or husband's voice, but I hear God's voice as audible in my heart.
I recently had another audible from God.
Back up a few years. When I lived in Chicago, I had a dear friend, Jennifer Mote, that was in my Listen to My Life neighborhood group. During that process, she felt lead to enter in to the Spiritual Direction program at North Park. She convinced me to look into the program too. It was about listening to God, listening to God with another, and listening to God in community. It lined up with what I do with Listen to My Life perfectly, so I applied, got accepted and completed the first year of the program.
Then we moved to Atlanta. When it was time for me to go back to Chicago for the 2nd year of the program, there were a dozen reasons that it didn't make sense for me to attend - mostly financial and some scheduling. So, I sat that year out. When I found out the week that I was to attend this year, I almost had a heartattack. It was the same week that I was to be in Florida for my daughter's national softball tournament. I couldn't miss that. I only have three more years with her, before she goes off to college.
My thoughts were - God, are you closing this door? Should I just give up finishing the program? Is there something else for me? So I watched and waited.
Since I moved to Atlanta, I have been seeing Gary Moon for Spiritual Direction. He helps me to listen to God in my life. I was connected with him through a friend from the North Park program.
In one of my meetings with Gary this year, I asked Gary for his input about other Spiritual Direction programs, etc. He said, "Well, I am biased, but I think Renovare is one of the best things out there...." He told me to read some Richard Foster and Dallas Willard's books to see if they connected with me. I then said, "I'll know in the first two chapters whether I connect with it or not." Why did I just say that?
I came home and looked up Celebration of Discpline on Amazon and previewed the first page or so, and this is what it said, "We must not be led to believe that the Disciplines are only for spiritual giants..or for those who are contemplatives who devote all their time to prayer and meditation. Far from it. God intends the disciplines of the Spiritual life to be for ordinary human beings: people who have jobs, who care for children, who wash dishes and mow lawns. In fact, the disciplines are best excercised in the midst of our relationships with our husband or wife, our brothers and sisters, our friends and our neighbors." I was in tears....
I was getting ready to leave on a trip to Costa Rica with a few other church members, so I hurriedly found a copy of Richard Fosters' Celebration of Discipline to take with me. My church bookstore had one copy...I'll take it! Next, I have an email from our Sr. Pastor and he is quoting Dallas Willard, then on Sunday, another Pastor has another Dallas Willard quote up on the video screen.
Next, I go to my Sunday School class, and we begin to talk about books that we might want to do, and someone says - Richard Fosters' Celebration of Discipline is a great book. You have got to be kidding me, really? Two Dallas Willard quotes and a Richard Foster book mentioned all within about 48 hours.
We arrive in Costa Rica and one of the church members says that he is staying for an extra couple of days for some solitude and reading. I asked him what he brought to read. The first book out of this mouth was Richard Fosters' Celebration of Discipline.
A week or so later, I am driving around Atlanta, and I had the thought that I had "wasted" a year of going through Spiritual Direction at North Park. Then I realized the circumstances that lead me to Renovare - Jennifer Mote, then North Park, then friend at North Park connects me to Gary Moon, Gary Moon connects me to Renovare. As these thoughts are streaming through my head, a song entitled Walk Down this Mountain by Bebo Norman is on. Something in this song (which I still don't know exactly what) just completely confirmed for me that Renovare was my next step.
I applied to Renovare and was accepted about two weeks ago. So the next two years, I will be studying Spiritual Formation with Dallas Willard and others. I will be in the deep end and in over my head. Just an ordinary human being who has a job, who cares for children, and who washes dishes excercising the spiritual disciplines in the midst of my relationships with my husband, children, sisters, parents, nieces, nephews, friends and neighbors.
Questions to Ponder
- Are you listening for audibles from God?
- Are you taking any next steps?
- If you aren't hearing audibles, can you schedule 10 mins a day just to listen for God?
- Sacred Rhythms by Ruth Haley Barton
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