In the early part of 2009, Jay and I were sensing that our season at Willow Creek was drawing to a close. We had had an amazing six year run there, but we were feeling restlessness in our souls. In April 2009, Jay and I decided to do a 30 day challenge with a scripture in Habakkuk 2 that my Spiritual Director had read to me. We were both going to read it each day and then discuss what we were hearing or learning from it. We had never done anything like that.
One day I read it and then read the sidenotes in the bible on Habakkuk, it said that he was on the watchtower (with an attitude of expectation - not fear), because he wanted to be in the best position to hear God's word.
One day, I read and reread the scripture, and I noted, "I will stand...I will climb...I will take up my position." Habakkuk acted while he waited for the vision.
It also said, "write down the vision." Jay and I decided it was time to write a resume, so that it was "ready to be carried."
At one point, Jay and I began taking turns on the watchtower. One night, he would be up at 3 or 4 AM and then another nite, I would wake up, and it would be my turn. One of those early awakenings, Jay journaled until he got to his "resignation letter" that he had written earlier in the back of the journal. He had written it, more as an excercise to express what words he would like to say, not necessarily something that he would send to anyone. He said that he felt like God was asking him to resign before he had another job.
In this economy, quit without another job?
I told Jay that I thought he should not quit before our upcoming trip to Africa. He had put a great team together and that was what he was passionate about, so we agreed to hold on a little longer.
Another day, I read the scripture again, For WHEN it comes (the vision), not if, but WHEN. Ok, God has a plan. Hang in there.
On another day, I was reading from Strengthening the Soul of Your Leadership by Ruth Haley Barton. She said, "The discernment process involves a major commitment to listening with love and attention to....those who will be most deeply affected by our decisions." In my spirit, I heard that we needed to talk to our kids about what was happening inside our souls.
So, we told our 13 year old daughter and our 10 year old son that we felt like God was up to something, but we didn't know the details - not when, not where. The conversation was holy ground. It was another confirmation that God was moving.
I began to see in my mind a trapeze artist - one that has to let go of one bar, before he can catch the next. And God was asking us to be in that place of letting go of Willow before the next bar was in sight. Frightening for sure. At one on my nights on the watchtower, I was reading John Ortberg's book, If You Are Going to Walk on Water, You Have to get Out of the Boat. And there I read the story about a trapeze artist. Confirmation again.
Jay decided to make a few phone calls to make some connections about other job possibilites. He talked with Reggie McNeal who is leader in the missional movement. Reggie suggested several places for Jay to check in to and several places for him to stay away from. Always good to know someone on the inside!
Reggie mentioned Vic Pentz at Peachtree Presbtyerian and the Peachtree Global Fellowship, PGF. That night, Jay and I looked at the PGF's website and we both were astonished at how much their vision lined up with Jay's vision. Jay decided to email Vic. Of course thinking that his email would fall into the bit bucket. Within a day, Vic emailed Jay and asked for his resume and his story.
As we prepared for our trip to Africa, we had a strong sense that it would somehow mark the finish line for us.
On July 2, Jay’s first day back at work after Malawi, he was contacted by Peachtree Presbyterian about a role that really fit his sense of calling. Over the ensuing weeks, God has made it clear that He is not just releasing us from Willow, but He is calling us to something new.
In August with breathless haste, we put our house in Chicago on the market, packed our personal belongings and moved to Atlanta - just four months after we intently sought God's will for our family with four verses of scripture.
Questions to Ponder: What trapeze bar is God asking you to let go of? What would it feel like to fall into God's will for you life?
